Catching It Before It Ruins Your Day

I’ve always had a tendency to come at things from a negative angle. Not because I want to, but because that’s what I was surrounded by growing up. It got ingrained in me. It’s not hardwired, but it’s been a default setting I’ve had to work really hard to change.

A friend recently asked why I always jump to the worst case scenario before I make a decision. I told them it’s because I’m data driven. I play the odds. If something’s gone wrong 80 out of 100 times before, why would I expect anything different?

They said something that really hit me..

“You throw that kind of energy out to the universe, and it comes right back.”

I actually agree. I’ve known people who constantly talk about being unlucky, being born losers, and that nothing ever goes right for them. And it perpetuates that cycle. It’s like they’re magnetically attracting more of what they hate, just by believing that’s all they’ll ever get.

I never went that far, but I did used to live by the motto..

“Expect the worst, hope for the best.”

But I’ve changed my stance.
Now my new one is..

“Expect the best, prepare for the rest.”

Because expecting the worst wasn't protecting myself. It was preloading my brain for disappointment.

The other morning proved it. I woke up ready for a quiet day, but my knee started bothering me out of nowhere with pain. Then boom, car problems. Then my backup car had problems. Then work called me in early. Any one of those things on its own could have thrown me off, but stacked together, I was on the path to letting my situation  completely derail my mood before the day even had a chance to start.

Instead, I made the effort to start thinking of good things, like small wins like an unexpected check I received in the mail, $30 I won off a $5 scratch ticket, the fact that I’m above ground, telling myself things like "it’s a good day" and "Some people would give anything for the chance to walk, even with sore knees". It seemed like once I started to force myself to think positive things, my brain took over, and they cascaded into more and more examples I was pulling out of my data banks effortlessly.

The more I practiced that, the more good things I noticed. My day didn’t magically get easier, but I did get better. It actually shifted my perception, which in turn changed my reality. It really blows my mind when I ponder this reality-perception connection.

Don’t get me wrong. This isn’t about saying a couple of affirmations and suddenly having your life turn around. It doesn’t work that way. It takes work. It takes a lot of conditioning to stay positive. It’s something that still doesn’t come naturally to me, but I’m hoping that someday, it will.

I'm finding if I just keep at it, it really does start to change something inside of me. You start noticing what’s working, not what’s wrong. And that tiny shift in focus changes everything.