Jun 21, 2018

Remember when McDonalds used to sell Milkshakes?

Retro Dads tend to rant. It's what we do. You know what I mean..

"Turn off that light".. 
"Turn that heater down"..
"Get off my lawn!"

Get the point?  Well today I have a 'Dad Rant' that involves fast food giant McDonald's.
I must admit, there's not much these days that I eat from the McDonald's menu.  However, there are a few items that spark up nostalgia, that I still consume from time to time. One of them being their Milkshakes.

I say this, but in all actuality it's been well over a year since I've been able to even purchase a McDonald's Shake. And it's not from a lack of trying mind you. I think I'm on a current stretch of 13 visits now where I have been denied a McDonald's milkshake.




It really is the damnedest thing.  Upon ordering my shake, the person taking my order always responds in the following manner..

A) "The machine is being cleaned"
B) "The machine is broken" 
C) "We're out of Shake mix"

Now it's not my place to tell McDonald's how to run their business, but I have some experience in the food industry and have a suggestion for them.  How about trying to clean the machine before or after business hours?  Here's a novel idea.. how about maybe trying to get corporate to fix your broken machine?  Also.. having an adequate stock of shake mix on hand might be a good idea.

Not that I, or anyone else for that matter really believes that the machine is always broken or needs cleaning. I really don't know what the heck the reason is, but why is the problem existent throughout the entire company.. across different stores.. and in multiple States?  I don't know, is it a conspiracy? Some kind of cruel joke? I know I'm not the only one that experiences this. In fact.. When I say anything about it on social media, friends, family, and acquaintances come out of the woodwork saying they have the exact same problem!


The only way I may ever obtain a McDonald's Milkshake again.

So many times I just wanted a simple cheeseburger and a strawberry shake and couldn't satisfy my craving over this last year.  Not to mention the seasonal shakes I actually went out of my way to purchase. I tried to order McDonald's eggnog milkshake three times last winter to no avail.  Same story with the Shamrock Shake which I wasn't able to purchase twice this spring.  Anyway, I have all but given up on ever getting a milkshake from McDonald's again. It's just a waste of my time and frustrates me to no end, so I guess I need to find somewhere else to satisfy my cravings.

I actually went to a D-Luxe Burger not too long ago at Disney Springs and ordered a hamburger and a strawberry milkshake.  Subconsciously, well.. maybe not so subconsciously, I was actually expecting to hear that their shake machine was down.  I actually paused a moment when I didn't get denied, because I was so shocked that I was actually going to be able to order a shake!  Yep.. D-Luxe Burger apparently cleans their shake machine prior to opening, keeps it maintained and in working order, and makes their shakes fresh (No mix needed).  By far.. the shake was one of the best I've had in recent years.

Then I got cocky.  A week later I went to Ghiradelli Soda Fountain also located in Disney Springs and ordered a Strawberry Milkshake. They too had no problems taking my order!  I watched anxiously as they hand scooped strawberry ice cream into a mixer and hand spun my shake made to order.  What a concept, getting a shake any time you want.  I could actually get used to this!  But.. you can't always buy out of the time to visit a sit-down restaurant for a burger and a shake, not to mention the hit to the pocketbook. That's why the novel idea of being able to get a milkshake from a fast food drive up is so appealing.

Well folks, that's the end of my mini rant, I feel a little bit better, but I'll be damned if I'm not craving a shake now!  If there are any App developers out there looking for the next big app idea.. designing an app that notifies you of the closest McDonald's with a functioning shake machine might be a big hit.  Heck.. you'd definitely get my dollar!


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